Slap happy

Ok. Calm down. Think. Pray. This is what I've been telling myself for the last 45 minutes since I left a meeting with my boss. Breathe. Pray. Calm down. Pray. I am not a violent person, but I've got to tell you I could have been one today. Never before have I wanted to hit someone so hard! I wanted to reach across the desk and smack her. Ahhhhhh!!!!! This is only the beginning!

I have loved my job for the last 3 years. That has changed in only one week! All of the freedom, creativity, and enjoyment that I loved has been sucked from me. Now, I just feel bitter, angry, and annoyed. It's only been a week! I want so much to love her like Jesus loves her, to see her as He does....but the truth is I don't. When I see her, my blood pressure rises. I can feel my pulse race and I want to hit her. What am I becoming?! Who is this person that rages on inside of me? For all that is holy and sacred, help me Lord!

I know it's melodramatic. That in all reality, it's not that bad. It's just that there's no need for all of this. There's no reason it should be like this. We were fine the way we were...we were doing great. There were no issues. So why is it then that there's suddenly all of this upheaval? What's that all about?

I don't know...all I do know is though is Lord, please let me get the job in Rome!!!!!!!!