My mom and I talked about my future while she was here and what the next couple of years look like. As of now the plan is to be here at least one more year, but quite honestly I don't want to be. It's not that I hate it here or my semester's been miserable because it hasn't been. Rather, it's just that I've come to realize just how important my family and friends are to me and how I'm not someone who was created to live away from them. This is the longest I've ever lived away from home and I hate that part of it. I don't know what to do. Frankly, I don't even want to stay past this year, but I feel obligated.
Whenever anyone hears what I am doing the automatic response is "that's amazing! How can I get that job?" And to some degree, it is amazing and this has been an incredible experience, but at the same time reality and the romantic notion of living/working abroad is so radically different. The reality is very lonely and very hard. My expectations and what is real are worlds apart. This is not what I thought it would be.
So, I guess for now I am praying about where God wants me. Here or there?
2 comments:
It is so hard to be far away from home - I am sorry you are struggling! I really notice I am SUPER homesick while I am trying to get back into routine after family leaves, (not that Portland and Rome and the same thing!!!) but the first few days after a visit are the hardest for me, maybe this will pass?
Thanks, Kate. This is really good advice. I have found this to be true in the last couple of days. ;)
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